Public speaking class is for this semester the most interesting class, the one i look forward to most.though i may complain about it, i really have a good time and leave the class with a positive feeling always.
This is all because of wonderful classmates! and i believe my sitting position cause the other half of the class on the other side seem stony.
PS didn't start off all that well, i remember facing technical issues during my first presentation and that initially no one was helping me solve the problem until the tutor screamed at the class. However,after that it has been smooth sailing. they're all really nice people.
We greet each other outside class if we happen to see each other, something which i don't do with my fellow yr 2 classmates,isn't it such a pity?
and in class they never fail to make me laugh and more importantly they're there to support you and not shun you down because they disagree with you. this really helps to boost confidence and makes the lesson forwarding looking.
sometimes i feel that PS class is infinitely more united compared to my own class,isn't it an irony. i only spend 2 hrs each wk with PS class and uncountable hrs with my class but idk why we're not even close to unity.
Its really amazing that such few words can have a huge impact.
Not to mention they're all so cuteee and funny! hehehe :D
Looking forward to the rest of their speeches next wk. 2 more lessons to go only, and i'm gonna remember this cds for life and probably going to miss them.
PS is a great cds in the sense that it makes you more socially aware and gets you thinking about general stuff.
(:
Despite all this happy moments in schools, i'm not able to pick myself up. :(
Last night before i slept, i told myself tomorrow will be a brand new day,with a fresh beginning.told myself to leave the unpleasant things behind but no, the moment i woke up i thought of it,sigh.
Please get him a new phone somehow and really quick.
<3
Wednesday, 30 January 2013
Monday, 28 January 2013
28/1/2013
Hello my space,
hmm,google once had some social networking site called my space right? is it still there, what's it about?
is it even powered by google? lol!
random thought just flew through ^
I came here to express my happiness for the winning part of the by-elections for Punggol East.
Yes, WORKER'S PARTY,WORKER'S PARTY.
It came as no surprise to me that they won,i mean the lady in blue was the only one who seemed she could do something...haha,what am i saying. however, my political views differ from that of my family and friends. they were quite shocked to know wp won.
I'm not saying wp is the best or whatsoever, but just looking at the candidates the various political parties put up,it was expected that wp would win.
Feel that the ruling party made a wrong move. they are lowering my faith in them. they put up a newbie for a by-election. like hello,are you out of your mind. you want this newbie to run a smc? who on earth is going to guide him and teach him on what to do and stuff..in the end it'll it a losing end for them, a waste of manpower. why not train him up properly like shadow a proper mp first then stand for elections in the next round? he'd perform better with more confidence. however, as a newbie i think he did put up a good fight. but again was it cause he's speeches were wrote for him? or his supporters were supporters of his party and voted blindly instead of basing it on the true potential of the candidates.
Anyway,i feel embarrassed for the candidate from reform party. idk how to spell his name, Mr J i shall call him. till today i have no idea what his point was. i mean what do you get by shunning your opponents. that's not the way to play the game, losers play it that way! boohoo,but again maybe it's just me who isn't able to understand him. well,its sad that he's deposit is forfeited,its a huge sum of money to me!!!
I feel that the next elections would bring about much more interesting stuff, especially in my area! On the day that the by-elections were announced, i heard a group of people cheering wp when we're currently under pap. wp supporters increasing over here,hmm...but pap is doing a good job in my area leh..
<3
hmm,google once had some social networking site called my space right? is it still there, what's it about?
is it even powered by google? lol!
random thought just flew through ^
I came here to express my happiness for the winning part of the by-elections for Punggol East.
Yes, WORKER'S PARTY,WORKER'S PARTY.
It came as no surprise to me that they won,i mean the lady in blue was the only one who seemed she could do something...haha,what am i saying. however, my political views differ from that of my family and friends. they were quite shocked to know wp won.
I'm not saying wp is the best or whatsoever, but just looking at the candidates the various political parties put up,it was expected that wp would win.
Feel that the ruling party made a wrong move. they are lowering my faith in them. they put up a newbie for a by-election. like hello,are you out of your mind. you want this newbie to run a smc? who on earth is going to guide him and teach him on what to do and stuff..in the end it'll it a losing end for them, a waste of manpower. why not train him up properly like shadow a proper mp first then stand for elections in the next round? he'd perform better with more confidence. however, as a newbie i think he did put up a good fight. but again was it cause he's speeches were wrote for him? or his supporters were supporters of his party and voted blindly instead of basing it on the true potential of the candidates.
Anyway,i feel embarrassed for the candidate from reform party. idk how to spell his name, Mr J i shall call him. till today i have no idea what his point was. i mean what do you get by shunning your opponents. that's not the way to play the game, losers play it that way! boohoo,but again maybe it's just me who isn't able to understand him. well,its sad that he's deposit is forfeited,its a huge sum of money to me!!!
I feel that the next elections would bring about much more interesting stuff, especially in my area! On the day that the by-elections were announced, i heard a group of people cheering wp when we're currently under pap. wp supporters increasing over here,hmm...but pap is doing a good job in my area leh..
<3
Friday, 25 January 2013
Distracted
In my post approximately a week ago i mentioned "may the smile on face prevail"....
In a confused state whether i should stop being appreciative or not...? maybe stop having expectations is the answer to everything. feels like every time i feel things are good or falling in place it never fails to just shad into pieces all over again.
Was working on my project determined to complete it before i go for my walk but now its not going to happen..Brains functioning way too much right now.
Sleeping is no longer a joy! :(
But absolutely love the idea of this little space of mine, because in times of urgent need to say things without having anyone to say it to or an appropriate place to mention it at, there's this ever welcoming space.
I've noticed myself posting about my worries and troubles more than anything else. Well that's because, lately i've taken on nerd mode and if i'm not in that mode i'm just too busy with tv or tumblr.
Yes,you've guessed it right, i'm here again today to speak about my troubles.
It sucks how i pick myself up to get work going and kicking and then just a phrase or sentence from somewhere,someone just triggers me up causing the sensation of a bomb blast about to occur.
The trigger a few minutes ago was: "the problem is like us.....you are not accepting it then what should i do,tell me."
Yes there's a problem at hand and i couldn't take it anymore so i decided to ask for opinions and then baaam,it suddenly relates to me and this person who i was asking.
This is not the feeling of guilty,idk what feeling this is. fyi, the problem has no relation to us,its completely different.
to the us: it's never gonna happen but he can't stop harping on it,he keeps asking me to reconsider but its just impossible. things that he does makes me feel bad for not being accepting as he puts it. well i'm ok with this situation as long as he keeps mentioning the fact that i'm rejecting.
the problem is problem. i cannot solve it and can't do anything to make it better and that's what kills.
Another thing on mind is dad's sudden interest in ahem. can't even remember if i've mentioned ahem's name on my blog but oh well let's make do with ahem. this situation is like a tangled roll of thick thread in my head. i cannot untangle it unless i open my mouth to ask thousands of questions, something i'm not up for at the moment.
Dad's issue aside, kakak ipah was asking me about him today too. It began with a question to an answer of no followed by you're lying, you do talk to him and i know it. ohhh shit..actually i'm ok with all of them knowing we talk but i don't to put off a wrong impression. so it ended with ask him about it.sighs.....
Praying really hard for le buddies to set sail for the better. Guilty of not talking enough to her and ensuring she's ok. want to meet her so badly but it doesn't look like its possible so all i can do is pray and pray for the better.
Missing the girl in thailand. her life's on a crossroad too.
so many issues in my head and not to mention on how much i am missing my 2 sweethearts!!
haven't met them since last yr! we sure would have so much to catch up on when we next meet. and waiting for march to come feels like forever a right now.
really thankful that i'm not the sort of girl would just breakdown and cry at everything.
may things move for the better and the better of all our lives.
Xoxo-
In a confused state whether i should stop being appreciative or not...? maybe stop having expectations is the answer to everything. feels like every time i feel things are good or falling in place it never fails to just shad into pieces all over again.
Was working on my project determined to complete it before i go for my walk but now its not going to happen..Brains functioning way too much right now.
Sleeping is no longer a joy! :(
But absolutely love the idea of this little space of mine, because in times of urgent need to say things without having anyone to say it to or an appropriate place to mention it at, there's this ever welcoming space.
I've noticed myself posting about my worries and troubles more than anything else. Well that's because, lately i've taken on nerd mode and if i'm not in that mode i'm just too busy with tv or tumblr.
Yes,you've guessed it right, i'm here again today to speak about my troubles.
It sucks how i pick myself up to get work going and kicking and then just a phrase or sentence from somewhere,someone just triggers me up causing the sensation of a bomb blast about to occur.
The trigger a few minutes ago was: "the problem is like us.....you are not accepting it then what should i do,tell me."
Yes there's a problem at hand and i couldn't take it anymore so i decided to ask for opinions and then baaam,it suddenly relates to me and this person who i was asking.
This is not the feeling of guilty,idk what feeling this is. fyi, the problem has no relation to us,its completely different.
to the us: it's never gonna happen but he can't stop harping on it,he keeps asking me to reconsider but its just impossible. things that he does makes me feel bad for not being accepting as he puts it. well i'm ok with this situation as long as he keeps mentioning the fact that i'm rejecting.
the problem is problem. i cannot solve it and can't do anything to make it better and that's what kills.
Another thing on mind is dad's sudden interest in ahem. can't even remember if i've mentioned ahem's name on my blog but oh well let's make do with ahem. this situation is like a tangled roll of thick thread in my head. i cannot untangle it unless i open my mouth to ask thousands of questions, something i'm not up for at the moment.
Dad's issue aside, kakak ipah was asking me about him today too. It began with a question to an answer of no followed by you're lying, you do talk to him and i know it. ohhh shit..actually i'm ok with all of them knowing we talk but i don't to put off a wrong impression. so it ended with ask him about it.sighs.....
Praying really hard for le buddies to set sail for the better. Guilty of not talking enough to her and ensuring she's ok. want to meet her so badly but it doesn't look like its possible so all i can do is pray and pray for the better.
Missing the girl in thailand. her life's on a crossroad too.
so many issues in my head and not to mention on how much i am missing my 2 sweethearts!!
haven't met them since last yr! we sure would have so much to catch up on when we next meet. and waiting for march to come feels like forever a right now.
really thankful that i'm not the sort of girl would just breakdown and cry at everything.
may things move for the better and the better of all our lives.
Xoxo-
Thursday, 17 January 2013
Thirst
Feeling super thirsty today,have been drinking lots of water but it ain't helping.
This means something...I probably spoke too much today.
From greeting Ms Lau in the morning to responding to 'how much did u get' to discussing company law to talking to le mysterious guy after super duper long!(he looked really good today!) to rehearsing for convy to casual convos with the group mates to bitching around with le good friend to spending the entire afternoon with the other good one to speaking non-stop to my adorable babies in the evening.
I'm exhausted.
The ulcer is finally getting better.didn't know I ulcers could appear because of accidentally hitting the toothbrush to the gums! Hahaha.yes that's what happened to clumsy people like me >.<
This week is going pretty much nicely,like I had expected it to be really hectic, chaotic and bad but hey I've been managing and am proud of myself for it :D
Angtsy-ness seems to be gone since today too,woohoo.thinking back, I think i'm quite freaky when I'm angtsy.I'd be scared of myself if I were not myself,makes sense.yes it does,haha.
Heading to school super early tmr cause we're super kiasu.doesn't kill to be so for desired grades.
Gonna keep s super look out for jy and walk to school with her.eggcited for no apparent reason,hahaha.
May the smile on my face prevail! (:
-Xoxo
Sunday, 13 January 2013
13/1/2013
2013 had a pretty good start with things falling into place. me knowing what i really want to do and focusing on them. me knowing how to manage my time and prioritize my work. but then came a day that just ruined everything.it was just all gone within minutes just when i thought i've got a tight grip.
well,its okay.i'm going to overcome all of this and i know it.what's life without challenges after all. how are you going to know how strong you are if you're never going to fall,right?
Thank god,i'm still positive with all of this because the day i'm not,its going to be the end.
Been procrastinating with all of my work. There's this whole long list waiting to be cancelled off. I don't understand why projects and tests must come at the same time. Really hope i'll be able to finish everything with flying colours, in a need to score well.
Don't like how everyone has a very high expectation of me.its horrible to disappoint people when you don't meet their expectations. Hate it how some people are just so nossy that they only make conversations with you just to know how you did. it sucks. not because you don't want to let others know how you did but because it just destroys you from within.
Have let not only myself down but also my family and friends. and even people who probably don't even care about it - ehm,classmates.
Really hoping to secure at least two As or even better Zs this semester and now am unsure if i'm able to do it.sigh.
All of this feeling low shit, is not only associated with school.
I've been trying my best to fulfill my new year's resolution or rather kick a healthy habit into myself but i can't seem to do it. the feeling of failing is not something i can tackle. i'd just give up overtime and i've done it too many times and it just has to stop.
and then there's this thing about not being able to say goodbyes. i don't understand why every year i have to bid farewell to someone close in some way. its just saddening. just the thought of it makes my mind wander way too much. hope i don't have to say anymore goodbyes in 2013 and better still for the next few years.
and then there's this stress of travelling. its so overwhelming that it takes away my precious sleep.have been talking way too much about this that i don't want to repeat it a x'th time.
no matter how i much i don't want to talk about this, i can no longer keep this within me.i can't even share it with anyone, be it a friend or a family member.maybe i can only do it with the person whose involved in this or some random stranger..both of which is not an ideal choice,it might just complicate things a lot further. all i can do i suppose is hope for things to go back to normal,or my feelings to just vanish.
may the remaining approximately 350 days of 2013 be as amazing as when it started.
<3
well,its okay.i'm going to overcome all of this and i know it.what's life without challenges after all. how are you going to know how strong you are if you're never going to fall,right?
Thank god,i'm still positive with all of this because the day i'm not,its going to be the end.
Been procrastinating with all of my work. There's this whole long list waiting to be cancelled off. I don't understand why projects and tests must come at the same time. Really hope i'll be able to finish everything with flying colours, in a need to score well.
Don't like how everyone has a very high expectation of me.its horrible to disappoint people when you don't meet their expectations. Hate it how some people are just so nossy that they only make conversations with you just to know how you did. it sucks. not because you don't want to let others know how you did but because it just destroys you from within.
Have let not only myself down but also my family and friends. and even people who probably don't even care about it - ehm,classmates.
Really hoping to secure at least two As or even better Zs this semester and now am unsure if i'm able to do it.sigh.
All of this feeling low shit, is not only associated with school.
I've been trying my best to fulfill my new year's resolution or rather kick a healthy habit into myself but i can't seem to do it. the feeling of failing is not something i can tackle. i'd just give up overtime and i've done it too many times and it just has to stop.
and then there's this thing about not being able to say goodbyes. i don't understand why every year i have to bid farewell to someone close in some way. its just saddening. just the thought of it makes my mind wander way too much. hope i don't have to say anymore goodbyes in 2013 and better still for the next few years.
and then there's this stress of travelling. its so overwhelming that it takes away my precious sleep.have been talking way too much about this that i don't want to repeat it a x'th time.
no matter how i much i don't want to talk about this, i can no longer keep this within me.i can't even share it with anyone, be it a friend or a family member.maybe i can only do it with the person whose involved in this or some random stranger..both of which is not an ideal choice,it might just complicate things a lot further. all i can do i suppose is hope for things to go back to normal,or my feelings to just vanish.
may the remaining approximately 350 days of 2013 be as amazing as when it started.
<3
Sunday, 6 January 2013
1st sunday of 2013
What's so special about the first sunday of the new year?
Well,maybe something that is unusual, is what makes it special but in a bad way?
Sundays without you is not a complete sunday. still one hr left to the end of sunday,please come by cause right now you're the only thing on my mind.
It's all my fault for coming up with such thoughts and expectations. I should've known that you'd be busy on your only free day. I mean, who am i to you,right?
Silly me dreams too much..
I should just spend my youth carefree and enjoy and be wild. Since in the end whatever is meant to be happens so i should not put in effort on my part?
All of this philosophical theories/sayings, are mysterious.
It can still be argued so what am i suppose to make out of it? i really don't know right now.
Put in effort and if it isn't meant to be leaves you broken and back to square one.
Don't put in effort then how's it going to be if it's meant to be? Miracles don't really exist in my world so howwww?
I'm trying to settle my life right now but i seem to be screwing it up more. hmm.shall just believe what's meant to be will be and i shall just do what i think is right,yes,this sounds legit.
Anyway,i'm really missing you so much today,i don't know why.please give me a good start to the coming week?
I won't say a thing throughout the week, am planning to really put my heart and soul to my school work, so much pending and much more upcoming.sighs.
This posts seems so ........k bye.
<3
Well,maybe something that is unusual, is what makes it special but in a bad way?
Sundays without you is not a complete sunday. still one hr left to the end of sunday,please come by cause right now you're the only thing on my mind.
It's all my fault for coming up with such thoughts and expectations. I should've known that you'd be busy on your only free day. I mean, who am i to you,right?
Silly me dreams too much..
I should just spend my youth carefree and enjoy and be wild. Since in the end whatever is meant to be happens so i should not put in effort on my part?
All of this philosophical theories/sayings, are mysterious.
It can still be argued so what am i suppose to make out of it? i really don't know right now.
Put in effort and if it isn't meant to be leaves you broken and back to square one.
Don't put in effort then how's it going to be if it's meant to be? Miracles don't really exist in my world so howwww?
I'm trying to settle my life right now but i seem to be screwing it up more. hmm.shall just believe what's meant to be will be and i shall just do what i think is right,yes,this sounds legit.
Anyway,i'm really missing you so much today,i don't know why.please give me a good start to the coming week?
I won't say a thing throughout the week, am planning to really put my heart and soul to my school work, so much pending and much more upcoming.sighs.
This posts seems so ........k bye.
<3
Saturday, 5 January 2013
When you don't know where to to go
Jab kuch samaj mai nahi aata and jab maloom nahi hota ki aapni maan ki baat kis ke saath share kaare to this dear blog is always here.
On the first day of 2013 I was determined to be back to my old sociable self.a noisy girl in class who makes friends easily and can have a casual convo with almost anyone.
But today,I feel like retreating from the world all over again. I don't know what triggered me but it's really how I feel..I can totally see myself being that typical girl who stays in her room all day watching tv and spending the time on the computer,on tumblr particularly.
Oh well,that's not my point.I have no problems with staying home and doing chores.
Baat to friendships ki hai.mujhe aisa kyo lagta hai ki meray pass koyi karibi doost nahi hai? Sab log aapni aapni life mai itnay masroof hai ki meray baaray mai socchnay ka waqt hi nahi?
Kuch waqt phelay mai aapnay doosto ko lay kar bahaut shukar guzar thi par aap aisa nahi raha.
I think I know what the problem is.larkay.yes larkay.jab unkay life mai larkay nahi thay tab hum bahaut karib the.now that there's someone,its all retreating.
How do I salvage this?
Mujhe unsay bahaut baatain karni hai,even if I have nothing much to say.magar I don't want to be making the first move all the time.I feel I've been doing it way too much.it takes two hands to clap.so I cant be in this alone.
Maybe mujhe hi samajnay mai deri hogayi.kya pata unko ab meri zaroorat nahi hai issy liye baat ya phir milna choor diye.
Mujhe bhi dekhna hai ki kitni derr baat wo log mujhe baat karangay. Let's wait and watch.
Maybe the saying - new relations cause old ones to be forgotten is true.
On a side note,so proud of myself for this partial post to be in mother tongue! Achievement.*pats self*
Really hoping to feel better.
Friday, 4 January 2013
UDSS
Today being the first Saturday of the year marks the beginning of mother tongue school.
I remember how I used to hate attending classes.firstly because it was on Saturdays, I mean I always felt that I deserved the 2-day break each wk from school.
However,after timeless explanations and the company of my beautiful mother I went without fail ob every Saturday.
Which person would be so nice to sacrifice their time doing absolutely nothing but waiting in the school compounds for my lesson to end.well that was my mother.
It was like she was attending school to.
We enter and leave the school at the same time.
Then I moved on to secondary school and things changed tremendously. I had to go by myself...I still dreaded it but soon enough I found a reason to motivate me.this brought me through the next four years.
Now that I've graduated from it and experienced unpleasantness which never fails to remind of mother tongue school, I don't want to ever go back there.
Today was a tough escape. I wonder if I'll be able to escape next week and the other upcoming Saturdays.
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