Why is it that everytime i'm low i turn to this space to express myself?
why not when i'm happy or when i'm leading a 'normal' life,not that i am not though.
just when i forgot my problem,booom,there it is before me once again.i don't blame anyone for this but myself,the problem is there whether or not i think about it so it's my duty to get rid of it right?
I think i have to invest more time into quite a lot of things.
I'm so sad right now cause i just realised i won't be seeing le people until like one wk later. but i'm glad to have spent the entire week with them (:
I'm so glad for my friends, i can cry. i mean it in a super sweet way. like they've been telling me they're here for me and boosting my strength and courage so must,it makes me tear with joy.
sometimes i feel low times like this is really important because it shows you who cares and who doesn't give a fuck.
but i've been ranting and complaining too much that i feel it's time i show them how much i appreciate it.
but then again howwww? i feel like a nutcase these days, i'm so blur and slow,i'm always lost to what i'm supposed to do,it's a real bad thing :/
so my bebo is leaving law. although i'm not very close to her, i feel this special connection. she was the one who had faith in me and trusted me even before we met face to face. she tried so much to make this friendship of ours grow to the point i felt like i was not letting her in my life.it's a regret i did not spend as much time as i could have with her. well, i hope she does well over at her college and becomes a successful legal assistant,my best wishes are with her always. i hope i can say a proper good bye to her on monday. really hope to see her this one last time. she's one sociable people. i knew the others through her.i guess i'm sad because i honestly feel i don't clique with people my race so easily and now that i did, life acts as a hindrance to the friendship.
I'm fated not to have close indian friends,HAHAHA.it's true okay~
I'll try talk to shalu more often,could see how she was going to break into tears when bebo broke the news to us. it felt like a couple parting,i'm not even kidding.
I'm so weird these days, my behaviour, my words, my thoughts, my actions. whats going on?!
Friday, 27 April 2012
Monday, 23 April 2012
1st day
Life as a junior has officially begun though it still felt the same,haha.
But ya, concourse was madly crowded with people hanging around refusing to move
and first time after a really long while we actually got seats at the benches along the corridor.
#weird #theirony
I think day one was quite pleasant though it could've been better if i was more sociable and friendly.
So i practically did not say hi to people i know. Only talked to the usuals and completely ignored the rest :/
ooopsy.
le lecturer likes to dance,HAHAHA,her style is so 'unique'. stop it now me,stop it!
i guess she left a really bad first image to us, all her law students.
really glad she's not my tutor.
i simply love my dora, wonder why the LT became so noisy upon knowing that she's one of the tutors.
so friday's timetable clashes,what is this shit.
oh le blur boy from 03 is in 03 again,hi old-new classmate.
and i know the names of my classmates already,time to match names with faces during lect tmr if it's gonna be boring.
whatever the situation i'm not looking forward to tutorials.
tired just after the 1st day,sighs.
<3
But ya, concourse was madly crowded with people hanging around refusing to move
and first time after a really long while we actually got seats at the benches along the corridor.
#weird #theirony
 |
I think day one was quite pleasant though it could've been better if i was more sociable and friendly.
So i practically did not say hi to people i know. Only talked to the usuals and completely ignored the rest :/
ooopsy.
le lecturer likes to dance,HAHAHA,her style is so 'unique'. stop it now me,stop it!
i guess she left a really bad first image to us, all her law students.
really glad she's not my tutor.
i simply love my dora, wonder why the LT became so noisy upon knowing that she's one of the tutors.
so friday's timetable clashes,what is this shit.
oh le blur boy from 03 is in 03 again,hi old-new classmate.
and i know the names of my classmates already,time to match names with faces during lect tmr if it's gonna be boring.
whatever the situation i'm not looking forward to tutorials.
 |
| noooooooooooooooooooo! ): |
tired just after the 1st day,sighs.
<3
Sunday, 22 April 2012
Yay or Nay?
Today's the last day of holidays, yay or nay?
School starts tomorrow, yay or nay?
Beginning year 2,junior, yay or nay?
Being forced to socialize more, yay or nay?
Having lpb as fam law tut, yay or nay?
Not expecting to face any kind of shitty drama, yay or nay?
Okay,stop else this will go on forever.
It's really a mixed feeling, i don't know - somehow i just can't decide whether i'll be better off once school starts.
I sure want to obtain a dip asap but i really dont know what'll be expected of me in class.
You know, being a junior and living up to the tutors standards.
I'm actually wondering what i'll do in the afternoons, now that my timetable's like meh..
Hopefully can use it to complete driving as soon as possible.
ohhh ohhh ohhh,something that got me all excited.
So there was this lady, she was asking when am i going to get married.
you know those people with the old mindset about girls marrying early or the moment they no longer look lika kid..mmm~ so i just sat there secretly smiling and sissy was like she's still studying. then she went on asking if there's any proposals for me and sissy was like no.to make it less awkward she said maybe you (the lady) can recommend some guys,HAHAHA,epic funny, i wouldn't marry just like that yo.
then the lady turned to me and was like yaya sure, would you mind marrying a paki?
hohohoho,super excited yo,couldnt help but laugh out loud cause ya know,hehe ^^
le sissy said no luh, singaporean would be easier and better.
and i said to myself hey yo, very soon i'll introduce to you a paki singaporean, then you'll have nothing to say..
omgggggggggg,wonder how long i was grinning luh.
oh ya, le family was having this conversation about the age gap between couples. hope they won't be particular when it comes to my turn to marry. hoping the age shit won't even cross their minds at least till i'm married,evil me.
happiness ends here as it's time to mentally and physically prepare myself for school.
<3
School starts tomorrow, yay or nay?
Beginning year 2,junior, yay or nay?
Being forced to socialize more, yay or nay?
Having lpb as fam law tut, yay or nay?
Not expecting to face any kind of shitty drama, yay or nay?
Okay,stop else this will go on forever.
It's really a mixed feeling, i don't know - somehow i just can't decide whether i'll be better off once school starts.
I sure want to obtain a dip asap but i really dont know what'll be expected of me in class.
You know, being a junior and living up to the tutors standards.
I'm actually wondering what i'll do in the afternoons, now that my timetable's like meh..
Hopefully can use it to complete driving as soon as possible.
ohhh ohhh ohhh,something that got me all excited.
So there was this lady, she was asking when am i going to get married.
you know those people with the old mindset about girls marrying early or the moment they no longer look lika kid..mmm~ so i just sat there secretly smiling and sissy was like she's still studying. then she went on asking if there's any proposals for me and sissy was like no.to make it less awkward she said maybe you (the lady) can recommend some guys,HAHAHA,epic funny, i wouldn't marry just like that yo.
then the lady turned to me and was like yaya sure, would you mind marrying a paki?
hohohoho,super excited yo,couldnt help but laugh out loud cause ya know,hehe ^^
le sissy said no luh, singaporean would be easier and better.
and i said to myself hey yo, very soon i'll introduce to you a paki singaporean, then you'll have nothing to say..
omgggggggggg,wonder how long i was grinning luh.
oh ya, le family was having this conversation about the age gap between couples. hope they won't be particular when it comes to my turn to marry. hoping the age shit won't even cross their minds at least till i'm married,evil me.
happiness ends here as it's time to mentally and physically prepare myself for school.
<3
Friday, 20 April 2012
My standing in life
so here's the continuation because i can't fall asleep.
Let's begin with the aspect in which i wish to stabilize most in right now.it's coming to 5 fucking years and i've still not mustered the courage to express my feelings for you. WHY? possibly because i'm this old-fashioned girl who wants the guy to make the first move. i've this feeling i'll end up being impulsive one day and just splurt it all out. well, still thinking of how to do so and once it's up to my standards i will, i must.
how foolish and silly of me to shove the matter away when it last arose.
iloveyoushab.
so i'm standing nowhere in this weird love life of mine.
I believe health should also be counted as one aspect of life because without good health achieving what you want to might be difficult. so my health looks fine but i feel weak from within. i think i have a lot of health issues which i'm running away from. from the discoloured foot of mine,all the way up to the head - the sudden giddiness and black spots before my vision sometimes, i can name problems after problems.
Thinking of getting a full body check up done but nay it's too costly,i shouldn't be making people spend so much on me an besides who am i kidding, i wont even go to the doctor's until it's a matter of life and death. on a side note, is cancer hereditary?
So then comes religion.
I'm sucha loser at it. I know very little about my religion. i don't even do the bare minimum to keep in touch with it. I want to but everytime i plan something to do about it, it fails on me. But really it's about time i read up and pray and do whatever my religion requires me to. Standing at maybe just level 1 in this aspect too ):
Lastly, would be studies. With my horrible gpa score you'd know i'm nowhere near making it to university. However, i'm still hopeful and on a very strong urge to buck up and somehow,by hook or by crook obtain a degree. I've never done well in school so it'll be a dream come true if i get a gpa of at least 3.7!!
I'd look at career too to complete my life but i guess i'm too young in this case. however, thinking about a career as a lawyer or as a paralegal i think i'll be a horrible one because the moment i'm angry i feel like screaming at the person at the top of my voice and this disrupts my chain of thoughts leading to only one point revolving around my head. so how am i going to put forth a strong case with organised points and arguements?
Omg,you know too much about my life after reading this,dammmmm! but here it really is, how much more shitty can it get? i seem to have problems in every aspect though i still continue trying and seeking for happiness in them. i believe i aim for things i can get with expectation i can attain and i really hope i'll be able to achieve them one day cause today might be too early to see where i stand.
I'd be glad enough if i can hit the satisfactory mark of my life really soon.
Life's such a struggle, I accept it as a challenge I'm sure to win (:
<3
Let's begin with the aspect in which i wish to stabilize most in right now.it's coming to 5 fucking years and i've still not mustered the courage to express my feelings for you. WHY? possibly because i'm this old-fashioned girl who wants the guy to make the first move. i've this feeling i'll end up being impulsive one day and just splurt it all out. well, still thinking of how to do so and once it's up to my standards i will, i must.
how foolish and silly of me to shove the matter away when it last arose.
iloveyoushab.
so i'm standing nowhere in this weird love life of mine.
I believe health should also be counted as one aspect of life because without good health achieving what you want to might be difficult. so my health looks fine but i feel weak from within. i think i have a lot of health issues which i'm running away from. from the discoloured foot of mine,all the way up to the head - the sudden giddiness and black spots before my vision sometimes, i can name problems after problems.
Thinking of getting a full body check up done but nay it's too costly,i shouldn't be making people spend so much on me an besides who am i kidding, i wont even go to the doctor's until it's a matter of life and death. on a side note, is cancer hereditary?
So then comes religion.
I'm sucha loser at it. I know very little about my religion. i don't even do the bare minimum to keep in touch with it. I want to but everytime i plan something to do about it, it fails on me. But really it's about time i read up and pray and do whatever my religion requires me to. Standing at maybe just level 1 in this aspect too ):
Lastly, would be studies. With my horrible gpa score you'd know i'm nowhere near making it to university. However, i'm still hopeful and on a very strong urge to buck up and somehow,by hook or by crook obtain a degree. I've never done well in school so it'll be a dream come true if i get a gpa of at least 3.7!!
I'd look at career too to complete my life but i guess i'm too young in this case. however, thinking about a career as a lawyer or as a paralegal i think i'll be a horrible one because the moment i'm angry i feel like screaming at the person at the top of my voice and this disrupts my chain of thoughts leading to only one point revolving around my head. so how am i going to put forth a strong case with organised points and arguements?
Omg,you know too much about my life after reading this,dammmmm! but here it really is, how much more shitty can it get? i seem to have problems in every aspect though i still continue trying and seeking for happiness in them. i believe i aim for things i can get with expectation i can attain and i really hope i'll be able to achieve them one day cause today might be too early to see where i stand.
I'd be glad enough if i can hit the satisfactory mark of my life really soon.
Life's such a struggle, I accept it as a challenge I'm sure to win (:
<3
Low
Am i experiencing mood swings?
I was talking just fine just now but now it feels like my heart has sank.
Maybe because i haven't had alone time the whole of today until now?
booya,why is emotions so hard to read?
psy class should've gone into detail about things like this and not just stop at there are 6 basic emotions that trigger others -.-
Today is one of the days where I picture my life as a whole. the complete me and not on just one aspect of my life.
Seeing the 3-D picture just makes me feel like shit because i feel as though i have a really low stand in life.
According to maslow's hierarchy of needs i probabbly stand at only the first level: psychological needs.
I feel insecure,very if i take a deep peek into myself.
I have a father,who has an exceptionally weird thinking,maybe it's those old-fashioned indian kinda mindset. but everyone has to keep up with the modern times. I can't stand being unappreciated all the time you know. Getting scolded and blamed at just cause I'm 5 minutes behind time of what I'm supposed to be doing. Listening to complains about me not being a good daughter to people who far far away and barely know me. It just sucks. I'm learning how to live with it but deep down there it is a continuous poking sensation.
Then i have my siblings who i really wonder what they think of me. Initially they were really supportive and i know even today they are here for me as they were before. However, their expectations have risen beyond what i can fulfil. They make me feel as though I'm tied back, they don't like when I'm busy with my own stuff but why can't i get the freedom you guys got when you were a teenager? i know life's unfair but a little to ask would be satisfactory. My life is a thousand times more mundane than yours was. I wish i could have more freedom and experience exciting things like you guys did. I need and want to see the world too!
As much as i know i've been the one causing quite a number of distress in the family, i've stopped complaining if you've noticed. i've been adapting and i'm really trying to care for everyone and eradicate the negatives that you guys have about me. I'm trying to be on good terms with my younger sister-in-law,i really am but just when i put in so much effort, more problems arise.
There's a lot of trivial matters that bothers me within the family, i want to solve it all though i know i'm no superhero but i love my family beyond words can express though my attitude is fucking shit at times. I don't show much concern in front of you guys because if you know i'm caught between the odds, you'll stop sharing.
There's many regrets to deal with as well and sadness plus memorises revolving my mind when i think of the word 'family'. how can i ever ever miss out my loveable mother, the best i could ever ask for and a caring grandmother. like mother like daughter they were,truly and i aspire to be like them one day.
Next to family comes friends,
there's so much more to say about friends because the chain starts all the way from kindergarten. I've been thinking of this cool malay friend i had when i was in primary 2. i really miss her.the phone calls and stuff we used to have. I really hope this friendship will come alive once again really soon.
then there's the primary school clique. everyone's so busy with their lives,they have no time for reunion. what saddens me most is when they say 'it'll be awkward'. it will because you're not willing to give it another chance. on a side note, really happy to know that le then bestfriend is in tp. gonna see her and most probably bus with her after like what 4 yrs? the last i met her was in sec 1 or 2?
moving on,secondary school chaps. there's so many of them i miss and want to see.maybe i've not been trying hard enough.but i really hate surface friends in the sense that if you're my surface friend i wouldn't want to keep going out with you and neither do i want to share my life stories with you so if you're asking me out we have to keep ourselves engaged with some activity then maybe eat and part ways.that sounds a bit mean but that's what i really feel. i miss my e2 peeps so bad but i don't want to force myself in. i'll go if i'm free and if you ask me. if you don't than i'll just live in sorrow on my own. i enjoy the moment but people may see it as i don't make an effort to talk...but hey my life is too mundane for me to be yaking all the time.
I'm so happy for whatsapp now,at least i can be crapping which in a way is communicating with my 2 beloveds because i think the key to everlasting friendship is communication. once that stops everything starts to fall apart.it's good that at least though only i have 2 such people in my life, i have someone there with whom i can be myself and speak my heart out. i've grown to be super conscious of people judging me and i've realised i have this thing, i like to make myself seem stupid in front of people when i actually am not.
poly started with the wrong company,screwed things up pretty much.moved on with some nice people but fuck it now i need to separate them from me? i just cannot. i'm no longer the type who loves to make friends and socialise after knowing how life in poly can get so miserable. i don't open up easily anymore either. le friend always ask why do i only tell her things which are outdated. it's because i fucking can't tell you on the spot. the only people who i've given this right is my two darlings because they've gained the trust from me.and i expect the same from you. i expect you to show me you care and not tell me you do. the slightest of care is enough to make me speak - the reason why boss might know more things about my life other than the bitchy people i meet in poly. well i think he's on par with that alr cause a casual conversation made me blurt out the problem i have with emo girl. the trick is to make me laugh when i'm down not ask me what i plan to do about it but give me suggestions on what i should.
it's to a point where i care so much but i dont know how to express it.
i was really happy to receive a phone call as early as the timetable was released to know if we're in the same class. i'm happy to know you girls and uhm guys are sad that we're not in the same class. so that's a plus on my emotions. but the fear of falling apart is much more than the happiness. the small positive things never fail to make me think i'm worng but the negative make me feels i'm right too. can you picture how i feel so stuck in between my emotions and feelings? how to deal with all of these?
i worry so much,think of solutions than think they are either useless or too extreme - abandon it,worry even more,panic,feel anxious and then try to forget abt it when i know things are better,try to forget about them.
i really hope that when they say our friendship won't fall apart due to the differences in class, they really mean it. cause i'm willing in to put in the effort to do so.
so i'm really nervous to make new friends. cause i'm afraid of going through all the shit again. and i don't know if i'll be able to. i know it's annoying for me to draw the line between classmates and friends but hey shouldn't people closer to me get some extra credits?
woah just realised i've been telling people which days i can meet them until i can't keep track..shit :/
first wk with my T03 nice people,i'll purposely sit beside them during lectures,hahahaa.
okay so i've only spoken about two aspects of my life. i think there's at least two more to go.
Love and religion. i'll talk about it later tonight if i've got the energy and am still feeling shitty, if not forget it.
I was talking just fine just now but now it feels like my heart has sank.
Maybe because i haven't had alone time the whole of today until now?
booya,why is emotions so hard to read?
psy class should've gone into detail about things like this and not just stop at there are 6 basic emotions that trigger others -.-
Today is one of the days where I picture my life as a whole. the complete me and not on just one aspect of my life.
Seeing the 3-D picture just makes me feel like shit because i feel as though i have a really low stand in life.
According to maslow's hierarchy of needs i probabbly stand at only the first level: psychological needs.
I feel insecure,very if i take a deep peek into myself.
I have a father,who has an exceptionally weird thinking,maybe it's those old-fashioned indian kinda mindset. but everyone has to keep up with the modern times. I can't stand being unappreciated all the time you know. Getting scolded and blamed at just cause I'm 5 minutes behind time of what I'm supposed to be doing. Listening to complains about me not being a good daughter to people who far far away and barely know me. It just sucks. I'm learning how to live with it but deep down there it is a continuous poking sensation.
Then i have my siblings who i really wonder what they think of me. Initially they were really supportive and i know even today they are here for me as they were before. However, their expectations have risen beyond what i can fulfil. They make me feel as though I'm tied back, they don't like when I'm busy with my own stuff but why can't i get the freedom you guys got when you were a teenager? i know life's unfair but a little to ask would be satisfactory. My life is a thousand times more mundane than yours was. I wish i could have more freedom and experience exciting things like you guys did. I need and want to see the world too!
As much as i know i've been the one causing quite a number of distress in the family, i've stopped complaining if you've noticed. i've been adapting and i'm really trying to care for everyone and eradicate the negatives that you guys have about me. I'm trying to be on good terms with my younger sister-in-law,i really am but just when i put in so much effort, more problems arise.
There's a lot of trivial matters that bothers me within the family, i want to solve it all though i know i'm no superhero but i love my family beyond words can express though my attitude is fucking shit at times. I don't show much concern in front of you guys because if you know i'm caught between the odds, you'll stop sharing.
There's many regrets to deal with as well and sadness plus memorises revolving my mind when i think of the word 'family'. how can i ever ever miss out my loveable mother, the best i could ever ask for and a caring grandmother. like mother like daughter they were,truly and i aspire to be like them one day.
Next to family comes friends,
there's so much more to say about friends because the chain starts all the way from kindergarten. I've been thinking of this cool malay friend i had when i was in primary 2. i really miss her.the phone calls and stuff we used to have. I really hope this friendship will come alive once again really soon.
then there's the primary school clique. everyone's so busy with their lives,they have no time for reunion. what saddens me most is when they say 'it'll be awkward'. it will because you're not willing to give it another chance. on a side note, really happy to know that le then bestfriend is in tp. gonna see her and most probably bus with her after like what 4 yrs? the last i met her was in sec 1 or 2?
moving on,secondary school chaps. there's so many of them i miss and want to see.maybe i've not been trying hard enough.but i really hate surface friends in the sense that if you're my surface friend i wouldn't want to keep going out with you and neither do i want to share my life stories with you so if you're asking me out we have to keep ourselves engaged with some activity then maybe eat and part ways.that sounds a bit mean but that's what i really feel. i miss my e2 peeps so bad but i don't want to force myself in. i'll go if i'm free and if you ask me. if you don't than i'll just live in sorrow on my own. i enjoy the moment but people may see it as i don't make an effort to talk...but hey my life is too mundane for me to be yaking all the time.
I'm so happy for whatsapp now,at least i can be crapping which in a way is communicating with my 2 beloveds because i think the key to everlasting friendship is communication. once that stops everything starts to fall apart.it's good that at least though only i have 2 such people in my life, i have someone there with whom i can be myself and speak my heart out. i've grown to be super conscious of people judging me and i've realised i have this thing, i like to make myself seem stupid in front of people when i actually am not.
poly started with the wrong company,screwed things up pretty much.moved on with some nice people but fuck it now i need to separate them from me? i just cannot. i'm no longer the type who loves to make friends and socialise after knowing how life in poly can get so miserable. i don't open up easily anymore either. le friend always ask why do i only tell her things which are outdated. it's because i fucking can't tell you on the spot. the only people who i've given this right is my two darlings because they've gained the trust from me.and i expect the same from you. i expect you to show me you care and not tell me you do. the slightest of care is enough to make me speak - the reason why boss might know more things about my life other than the bitchy people i meet in poly. well i think he's on par with that alr cause a casual conversation made me blurt out the problem i have with emo girl. the trick is to make me laugh when i'm down not ask me what i plan to do about it but give me suggestions on what i should.
it's to a point where i care so much but i dont know how to express it.
i was really happy to receive a phone call as early as the timetable was released to know if we're in the same class. i'm happy to know you girls and uhm guys are sad that we're not in the same class. so that's a plus on my emotions. but the fear of falling apart is much more than the happiness. the small positive things never fail to make me think i'm worng but the negative make me feels i'm right too. can you picture how i feel so stuck in between my emotions and feelings? how to deal with all of these?
i worry so much,think of solutions than think they are either useless or too extreme - abandon it,worry even more,panic,feel anxious and then try to forget abt it when i know things are better,try to forget about them.
i really hope that when they say our friendship won't fall apart due to the differences in class, they really mean it. cause i'm willing in to put in the effort to do so.
so i'm really nervous to make new friends. cause i'm afraid of going through all the shit again. and i don't know if i'll be able to. i know it's annoying for me to draw the line between classmates and friends but hey shouldn't people closer to me get some extra credits?
woah just realised i've been telling people which days i can meet them until i can't keep track..shit :/
first wk with my T03 nice people,i'll purposely sit beside them during lectures,hahahaa.
okay so i've only spoken about two aspects of my life. i think there's at least two more to go.
Love and religion. i'll talk about it later tonight if i've got the energy and am still feeling shitty, if not forget it.
Thursday, 19 April 2012
Depressed
If falling into depression is really so easy than i think i have major depression.
I mean it on a serious note.
Timetable's released today and fuck this shit.
Though it may seem very less texting seeing classes ending early with little long breaks it sucks to know that none of your good friends will be by your side.
i'm really sad about this,i am cause so far those who're in 03 aren't those i foresee myself clicking well with. there needs to be some kind of bond in order for projects and stuff to go well right..
nevertheless, i've realised i should brace myself and take this positively.
never judge a book by its cover~
secretly hoping mysterious guy is in the same class as me,at least i'll be glad to know there's someone there.
so i shall throw all my grieve into the bin and be happy.
i really hope year 2 will be much more better and easy going for everyone.
no dramas,no struggle, just effort and good grades with lots of funnn.
and free time for my dearest friends to spend with me.
actually there was a lot of things i wanted to say but than everything just escaped my mind,hais.
oh ya, today's a happy day cause i woke up to a phoneeee call,haha.
incidents like this make me think that i'm just simply paranoid and i overthink.
but when i'm insecure i really am,beyond words can explain.
Here's to everyone who should cheer up and stop thinking about their classes cause i'm sure if the friendship's true,we'll find a way through this (:
<3
I mean it on a serious note.
Timetable's released today and fuck this shit.
Though it may seem very less texting seeing classes ending early with little long breaks it sucks to know that none of your good friends will be by your side.
i'm really sad about this,i am cause so far those who're in 03 aren't those i foresee myself clicking well with. there needs to be some kind of bond in order for projects and stuff to go well right..
nevertheless, i've realised i should brace myself and take this positively.
never judge a book by its cover~
secretly hoping mysterious guy is in the same class as me,at least i'll be glad to know there's someone there.
so i shall throw all my grieve into the bin and be happy.
i really hope year 2 will be much more better and easy going for everyone.
no dramas,no struggle, just effort and good grades with lots of funnn.
and free time for my dearest friends to spend with me.
actually there was a lot of things i wanted to say but than everything just escaped my mind,hais.
oh ya, today's a happy day cause i woke up to a phoneeee call,haha.
incidents like this make me think that i'm just simply paranoid and i overthink.
but when i'm insecure i really am,beyond words can explain.
Here's to everyone who should cheer up and stop thinking about their classes cause i'm sure if the friendship's true,we'll find a way through this (:
<3
Monday, 16 April 2012
obsession overloaded
If you been seeing my tumblr, you'd know how instantly i want to get married right now!
i really do.i think getting married young is simply awesome, old traditions should be here to stay,it's so cute!
I don't really like the idea of marrying old cause then you'll have less time to spend with your beloved and also it'll mean you'll be wondering around for a much longer time which may not be so good.
there's more reasons to be but hack it cause me fantasizing over getting married is waaay much more important to me,haha!
I WANNA GET MARRIED.I want a sweet simple wedding. i don't need a huge grand one. I want it to be with all the customs and traditions.Yes, i think i need to uphold the indian spirit and without those 'ceremonies' that they have the wedding is going to be dull. and i'm a desi girl afterall (:
So here's how my my wedding will be :
I don't quite know the proper names given to all the rituals so i'm just going to briefly say what happens.
1st night:
"heldi rasam" will take place. cuzzies will hold a scraf over my head while the elder's sissy and aunt's will apply tumeric on my face,hands,legs. it's a all girls event.
2nd night:
it'll "mehandi". will probably get someone to come over to apply mehandi on my hands and legs. and the rest of the family and relatives will put it for each other. this would also be the "radjaga" which means we 'party' all night. relatives will stay over and i don't quite know what they do cause i normally apply henna and then go to bed,haha! i'll find out :D last minute wedding preps also happen here.
3rd day:
Early rise and shine,bath and get ready.woohoo. today's the big day. get dressed and wait patiently for the groom + his people to come over. say "i do, i do, i do" and sign the marriage cert,hehe! then le groom will come over to lift the veil and we'll salam before exchanging rings. lots of photo than off to the "stage". sit,photo,small chats with people who come by.
Eat,cake cutting ceremony, maybe some performances if my family members initiate.
Then before dawn it'll be 'bidaii' time = time to say goodbye. the girl officially leaves her home to her husbands'. yaaaa,shed tears say your goodbyes,sit in the car and start to feel all excited.
Nupital night:
I can't say what happens cause it differs from couples to couples and yaa.hahaha. but oh ya one common thing is that the girl gets a gift from her hubby,yay.
4th morning:
My side of the family, usually females will come over my hubby's place with breakfast for us. they'll assist me in getting ready than we'll eat together. they get to stay as long as they please (:
5th day:
Depending on hubby's side,the wedding reception may either be in the afternoon or evening/night. so another day of smiling,meeting people and photo taking.
That usually marks the end of the wedding. but i get to go home after the wedding reception for as long as i want and then the newly weds are invited over to their relatives place sometime after the wedding for dinner and stuff...
Oh ya before the first official day of the wedding, close relatives will come over very often to help out with the decor and wedding prep.you know we make our own 'boxes' in which we put the things to be given to le hubby. and also to pack clothes for me which'll be given from my family to me.
So excitedly anticipating a family wedding right now.
I want to marry earlier than them all but it's quite mean cause the community i belong to just sucks.they say a thousand things over small issues and i don't like to hear them.
I happen to be the fifth in 'waiting to be married' queue ):
But well what's fated will happen and i hope i'm fated to marry sooooooooooon! (:
I believe le family is expecting me to marry young too and i've this instinct that tells me they're gonna wait for me to find myself a suitor and tell them i wanna marry before they take any step ahead. i will and i want to do that too,i just need to put my shit together and gather enough courage to speak words of my heart.
till i put my shit together, i'll continue to fantasise about getting married,haha.
<3
i really do.i think getting married young is simply awesome, old traditions should be here to stay,it's so cute!
I don't really like the idea of marrying old cause then you'll have less time to spend with your beloved and also it'll mean you'll be wondering around for a much longer time which may not be so good.
there's more reasons to be but hack it cause me fantasizing over getting married is waaay much more important to me,haha!
I WANNA GET MARRIED.I want a sweet simple wedding. i don't need a huge grand one. I want it to be with all the customs and traditions.Yes, i think i need to uphold the indian spirit and without those 'ceremonies' that they have the wedding is going to be dull. and i'm a desi girl afterall (:
So here's how my my wedding will be :
I don't quite know the proper names given to all the rituals so i'm just going to briefly say what happens.
1st night:
"heldi rasam" will take place. cuzzies will hold a scraf over my head while the elder's sissy and aunt's will apply tumeric on my face,hands,legs. it's a all girls event.
2nd night:
it'll "mehandi". will probably get someone to come over to apply mehandi on my hands and legs. and the rest of the family and relatives will put it for each other. this would also be the "radjaga" which means we 'party' all night. relatives will stay over and i don't quite know what they do cause i normally apply henna and then go to bed,haha! i'll find out :D last minute wedding preps also happen here.
3rd day:
Early rise and shine,bath and get ready.woohoo. today's the big day. get dressed and wait patiently for the groom + his people to come over. say "i do, i do, i do" and sign the marriage cert,hehe! then le groom will come over to lift the veil and we'll salam before exchanging rings. lots of photo than off to the "stage". sit,photo,small chats with people who come by.
Eat,cake cutting ceremony, maybe some performances if my family members initiate.
Then before dawn it'll be 'bidaii' time = time to say goodbye. the girl officially leaves her home to her husbands'. yaaaa,shed tears say your goodbyes,sit in the car and start to feel all excited.
Nupital night:
I can't say what happens cause it differs from couples to couples and yaa.hahaha. but oh ya one common thing is that the girl gets a gift from her hubby,yay.
4th morning:
My side of the family, usually females will come over my hubby's place with breakfast for us. they'll assist me in getting ready than we'll eat together. they get to stay as long as they please (:
5th day:
Depending on hubby's side,the wedding reception may either be in the afternoon or evening/night. so another day of smiling,meeting people and photo taking.
That usually marks the end of the wedding. but i get to go home after the wedding reception for as long as i want and then the newly weds are invited over to their relatives place sometime after the wedding for dinner and stuff...
Oh ya before the first official day of the wedding, close relatives will come over very often to help out with the decor and wedding prep.you know we make our own 'boxes' in which we put the things to be given to le hubby. and also to pack clothes for me which'll be given from my family to me.
So excitedly anticipating a family wedding right now.
I want to marry earlier than them all but it's quite mean cause the community i belong to just sucks.they say a thousand things over small issues and i don't like to hear them.
I happen to be the fifth in 'waiting to be married' queue ):
But well what's fated will happen and i hope i'm fated to marry sooooooooooon! (:
I believe le family is expecting me to marry young too and i've this instinct that tells me they're gonna wait for me to find myself a suitor and tell them i wanna marry before they take any step ahead. i will and i want to do that too,i just need to put my shit together and gather enough courage to speak words of my heart.
till i put my shit together, i'll continue to fantasise about getting married,haha.
<3
Thursday, 12 April 2012
bearbear bohboh
^ LOL
Here's a quick update on my '18 to-do list':
1. Rebond hair
2. Dye hair
3. Register for driving
4. Ear piercing
5. M18 movie
6. Get a new phone
7. Permanently close the bloody gap in my freaking teeth!
8. Plan a surprise birthday party for at least 1 person close to my heart
9. Get a earning collection
10. Experience the work industry!!!!! (feeling sucha loser not having worked even once in my life :/)
11. As crazy as it sounds,i wanna buy a pack of ciggs THIS DOES NOT EQUATE TO CONSUMPTION
12. Ice-cream buffet
13. Shisha?
14. Travel outta Singapore
15. Confront a fear (probably heights) = go to an amusement park and try out the craziest ride
16. Say iloveyou to the person who in my thinking deserves it
17. Have a go at manicure
18. Sleep in a lingerie
That leaves me with 10 things to go.woohoo going at a steady bomb-pi-pi rate and i'm loving mah life. not to mention school's gonna start and my views may then differ,hohoho.
This holidays seems to be going way better than i expected it to be.
and again i'd like to mention it's an eye-opener.
I'm blessed for the awesomeness given to me by my dearest people. i'm contemplating if i should reveal who they are,ha ha.if i'm happy at the end i might,heeeehe.
and again i start to wonder who are the people who view and read things on this site.
I'm quite amazed at life, truly.then you'd ask me what is life to me.well it's everything it can possibly,everything under the sun is life. and you choose how you live it. my policy of living it simply is still on (:
different people,different perspective - don't judge a person by just the few words said by him.
so someone was trying to read me,and i'm sure the reading would not tally with what i really am cause i delibrately acted dumb because i was confused. i do not know if i should be revealing things or not.
well,i'm glad i acted that way.
cause i would've been a disappointment to someone whom i don't want to disappoint.
I'm really lucky to have people who know they can turn to me,yes,today i'm blessed that there are people out there who think i'm worthy enough to be there for them.
you can conclude that i'm weird cause i myself have never heard of people,anyone for that matter saying what i just did.
gosh,i've started describing myself as 'weird'. am i really,i'd like to know!
Taking a second glance at my list,i'm just like oh god,what was i thinking when i listed it out. how on earth am i going to fulfil no.16? it's the hardest amongst all lor. creative juices have died.
someone please tell me how do i do it in a super friendly manner?
though i utter pick up lines randomly it isn't what i'm ever going to do here.and neither do i wanna use the childish approach.
it's totally different.i need to be u-n-i-q-u-e
oh holly fuck,sorry,but this random thought just breezed through me and i'm wondering what that person meant when he said "normally,people say they know what they want to do in future to escape being further questioned" hello, i said i know what i wanted to do so were you judging because i didn't elaborate on what i see myself doing in 5 yrs?
chillaxe..
off to watch my dramas,sucha desi girl i am,hehe!
<3
Here's a quick update on my '18 to-do list':
7. Permanently close the bloody gap in my freaking teeth!
8. Plan a surprise birthday party for at least 1 person close to my heart
10. Experience the work industry!!!!! (feeling sucha loser not having worked even once in my life :/)
11. As crazy as it sounds,i wanna buy a pack of ciggs THIS DOES NOT EQUATE TO CONSUMPTION
12. Ice-cream buffet
13. Shisha?
14. Travel outta Singapore
15. Confront a fear (probably heights) = go to an amusement park and try out the craziest ride
16. Say iloveyou to the person who in my thinking deserves it
17. Have a go at manicure
That leaves me with 10 things to go.woohoo going at a steady bomb-pi-pi rate and i'm loving mah life. not to mention school's gonna start and my views may then differ,hohoho.
This holidays seems to be going way better than i expected it to be.
and again i'd like to mention it's an eye-opener.
I'm blessed for the awesomeness given to me by my dearest people. i'm contemplating if i should reveal who they are,ha ha.if i'm happy at the end i might,heeeehe.
and again i start to wonder who are the people who view and read things on this site.
I'm quite amazed at life, truly.then you'd ask me what is life to me.well it's everything it can possibly,everything under the sun is life. and you choose how you live it. my policy of living it simply is still on (:
different people,different perspective - don't judge a person by just the few words said by him.
so someone was trying to read me,and i'm sure the reading would not tally with what i really am cause i delibrately acted dumb because i was confused. i do not know if i should be revealing things or not.
well,i'm glad i acted that way.
cause i would've been a disappointment to someone whom i don't want to disappoint.
I'm really lucky to have people who know they can turn to me,yes,today i'm blessed that there are people out there who think i'm worthy enough to be there for them.
you can conclude that i'm weird cause i myself have never heard of people,anyone for that matter saying what i just did.
gosh,i've started describing myself as 'weird'. am i really,i'd like to know!
Taking a second glance at my list,i'm just like oh god,what was i thinking when i listed it out. how on earth am i going to fulfil no.16? it's the hardest amongst all lor. creative juices have died.
someone please tell me how do i do it in a super friendly manner?
though i utter pick up lines randomly it isn't what i'm ever going to do here.and neither do i wanna use the childish approach.
it's totally different.i need to be u-n-i-q-u-e
oh holly fuck,sorry,but this random thought just breezed through me and i'm wondering what that person meant when he said "normally,people say they know what they want to do in future to escape being further questioned" hello, i said i know what i wanted to do so were you judging because i didn't elaborate on what i see myself doing in 5 yrs?
chillaxe..
off to watch my dramas,sucha desi girl i am,hehe!
<3
Sunday, 8 April 2012
thinking......over-thinking?
fuck this shit.
the holidays are silently driving me crazy.
though i spazz and complain a lot about my horrible experiences in school..actually more of just projects, this holidays is waaay too insane.
during schooling days,i talk a lot but the feelings are just temporary,i overcome it after a few days and there i am happy as ever all over again,i don't keep forever thinking about it even though i say i do. it doesn't bother me as much as i'm bothered this holidays.
well, maybe this holidays is for the remaining days and was for the days that have passed a time to really reflect on my life,the ups and downs, to picture things with a vivid view,to clear my confusions and doubts.
anyway,the reason why i'm on rage mode right now is probably because i have nothing much to keep myself busy with which ends up with me visiting random sites and taadaa finding out too much information,stuff which i don't need to know because the outcome is here for you to see yourself.
it makes my blood boil to know that children don't appreciate their parents and are out there in the open world to seek revenge. fuck you,i swear i'd fuck you upside down if i could and if my morals permitted me to. hell you, can't you see where you are standing today? who brought you this far? who struggled to keep you alive when you were born as puny baby, the size of my fucking palm?
If you have had no childhood it's because you were way too precious to your parents who feared on losing you and not you know, it's possible to have childhood within the four walls of your house,well that's if you have normally functioning brain to inspire you on what you can do!
You've been pampered way too much, to a point where i'm feeling guilty and sad for you.
Mommy shouldn't have spoke to your dad to give you more freedom when you were younger cause see the results are pathetic. you should still be confined with that four walls because you're crossing your limits way too much.
Every couple have disputes so did your parents and mine. things get resolved after time and the love deepens.people move on,forgive and try to forget. they're heads up for the future but no you're stuck with the old stupid mentally of holding on until you seek revenge,why oh why?
If there's so much hatred, why sing praises to the whole world? who the fuck are you lying to? the world is so madly filled with devils,DEVILS i say and i see you as one. oh ya how can i forget your source of luxurious living comes from there no wonder the pretence.
I NEED TO EXERCISE SELF-CONTROL.
I feel the need to counsel you and bring you to the right path. i feel like shouting out to the world for help,for you. i bet you'll be the world's angriest person to know i've discovered your truth and to tolerate me for the rest of your life.
the thing that hit me most is your fucking attitude - the lies, the pretence and the feeling you have developed.
i have no idea why you're doing all this but i certainly know it's all fucking wrong,very wrong,and this has to stop. oh well, even with attaining the law degree that you aspire, i bet you you won't succeed in your revenge or avenge as you put it so.you beloved one will be the cause of your hindrance,trust me in my words. the world would go against go when you try to do so.only then will you realize how terribly wrong you are?
I see it all now, i perfectly understand it or so i may feel..i don't blame you for addiction towards harmful stuff which you presume halal.i don't think you're that dumb not to know but i MUST clear your doubt, perhaps the next time i see you.the food served at that place is halal not the hookah,geddit?
If i'm this disappointed can you imagine how much more your parents will fall to find out all about you?
gossssh, speaking about curfew it's no wonder you have one, how can your parents blindly trust you when you're like this? don't try to use me as an excuse to get your curfew removed okay bitch?
there's a hell lot of difference between the two of you and me.
it's kinda obvious.
it shows if you can't see it for yourself.
well, even if you can't i'm sure people would've told you, like they've told me, i can't believe you guys are related.
i've got something called self-respect, i wonder where you've lost your.
i don't indulge myself in things the world sees as beauty because i think it's pointless.
unlike you two who see it as a necessity to keep up with a world.
for certain things, there's no fucking need to keep up with the insane world, understand little kid?
oh wait,no longer teenager,HAHAHA.
what the world presumes as right might in the end be wrong so therefore, use your principles to judge and make a wise decision and stand by it always and never stray away cause that's the only right thing to do and the only thing to keep you going too.
okay rage mode needs to stop right now, but honestly,i hope i can shut my mind from all these thinking like how i can choose to stop raging about it!
i need to speak to someone who can help but who, i see no one. i need a solution, can you give me one?
i can't imagine how oblivious the da chiaye can be.maybe she's doing something,just that i don't know so i must stop judging!
O-K-A-Y. S-T-O-P
sorry for the abusive language and hurtful words and for raging.
i need the strength to endure.
<3
the holidays are silently driving me crazy.
though i spazz and complain a lot about my horrible experiences in school..actually more of just projects, this holidays is waaay too insane.
during schooling days,i talk a lot but the feelings are just temporary,i overcome it after a few days and there i am happy as ever all over again,i don't keep forever thinking about it even though i say i do. it doesn't bother me as much as i'm bothered this holidays.
well, maybe this holidays is for the remaining days and was for the days that have passed a time to really reflect on my life,the ups and downs, to picture things with a vivid view,to clear my confusions and doubts.
anyway,the reason why i'm on rage mode right now is probably because i have nothing much to keep myself busy with which ends up with me visiting random sites and taadaa finding out too much information,stuff which i don't need to know because the outcome is here for you to see yourself.
it makes my blood boil to know that children don't appreciate their parents and are out there in the open world to seek revenge. fuck you,i swear i'd fuck you upside down if i could and if my morals permitted me to. hell you, can't you see where you are standing today? who brought you this far? who struggled to keep you alive when you were born as puny baby, the size of my fucking palm?
If you have had no childhood it's because you were way too precious to your parents who feared on losing you and not you know, it's possible to have childhood within the four walls of your house,well that's if you have normally functioning brain to inspire you on what you can do!
You've been pampered way too much, to a point where i'm feeling guilty and sad for you.
Mommy shouldn't have spoke to your dad to give you more freedom when you were younger cause see the results are pathetic. you should still be confined with that four walls because you're crossing your limits way too much.
Every couple have disputes so did your parents and mine. things get resolved after time and the love deepens.people move on,forgive and try to forget. they're heads up for the future but no you're stuck with the old stupid mentally of holding on until you seek revenge,why oh why?
If there's so much hatred, why sing praises to the whole world? who the fuck are you lying to? the world is so madly filled with devils,DEVILS i say and i see you as one. oh ya how can i forget your source of luxurious living comes from there no wonder the pretence.
I NEED TO EXERCISE SELF-CONTROL.
I feel the need to counsel you and bring you to the right path. i feel like shouting out to the world for help,for you. i bet you'll be the world's angriest person to know i've discovered your truth and to tolerate me for the rest of your life.
the thing that hit me most is your fucking attitude - the lies, the pretence and the feeling you have developed.
i have no idea why you're doing all this but i certainly know it's all fucking wrong,very wrong,and this has to stop. oh well, even with attaining the law degree that you aspire, i bet you you won't succeed in your revenge or avenge as you put it so.you beloved one will be the cause of your hindrance,trust me in my words. the world would go against go when you try to do so.only then will you realize how terribly wrong you are?
I see it all now, i perfectly understand it or so i may feel..i don't blame you for addiction towards harmful stuff which you presume halal.i don't think you're that dumb not to know but i MUST clear your doubt, perhaps the next time i see you.the food served at that place is halal not the hookah,geddit?
If i'm this disappointed can you imagine how much more your parents will fall to find out all about you?
gossssh, speaking about curfew it's no wonder you have one, how can your parents blindly trust you when you're like this? don't try to use me as an excuse to get your curfew removed okay bitch?
there's a hell lot of difference between the two of you and me.
it's kinda obvious.
it shows if you can't see it for yourself.
well, even if you can't i'm sure people would've told you, like they've told me, i can't believe you guys are related.
i've got something called self-respect, i wonder where you've lost your.
i don't indulge myself in things the world sees as beauty because i think it's pointless.
unlike you two who see it as a necessity to keep up with a world.
for certain things, there's no fucking need to keep up with the insane world, understand little kid?
oh wait,no longer teenager,HAHAHA.
what the world presumes as right might in the end be wrong so therefore, use your principles to judge and make a wise decision and stand by it always and never stray away cause that's the only right thing to do and the only thing to keep you going too.
okay rage mode needs to stop right now, but honestly,i hope i can shut my mind from all these thinking like how i can choose to stop raging about it!
i need to speak to someone who can help but who, i see no one. i need a solution, can you give me one?
i can't imagine how oblivious the da chiaye can be.maybe she's doing something,just that i don't know so i must stop judging!
O-K-A-Y. S-T-O-P
sorry for the abusive language and hurtful words and for raging.
i need the strength to endure.
<3
Thursday, 5 April 2012
Dear Best Friend
I remember asking can a person only have one best friend sometime not too long ago. my dearest friend told me it depends and today as i'm typing this i feel certain that one can have more than one best friend.woah,it sure took me long to conclude it aye...oh well.
Disclaimer: If you know you're my best friend, read everything with 'YOU'
A friendship with a best friend is something really special beyond words can explain. I'm really very blessed to have best friends whom I can speak my heart to,do the weirdest and craziest things with,trust blindly, know that someone out in this wild world has faith and believes in me and most importantly spend awesomest quality time with in the simplest of things we do together,say a cheap lunch or just hanging around.not to mention how time and again they are the ones lifting my spirits high, making me smile on a glumy day and brightening up my day with the smallest things like nobody else :D
and i found this cute thing on the net:
There's no one like you! (:
I love you from the bottom of my heart!
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ multipled by
Disclaimer: If you know you're my best friend, read everything with 'YOU'
A friendship with a best friend is something really special beyond words can explain. I'm really very blessed to have best friends whom I can speak my heart to,do the weirdest and craziest things with,trust blindly, know that someone out in this wild world has faith and believes in me and most importantly spend awesomest quality time with in the simplest of things we do together,say a cheap lunch or just hanging around.not to mention how time and again they are the ones lifting my spirits high, making me smile on a glumy day and brightening up my day with the smallest things like nobody else :D
Believe in one another
Encourage each other
Share silly stories
Tell it like it is
Find the answers
Rely on each other
Inspire to strive for the better
Enlightenment
Never stop caring
Drive me insane with the sweetest things
Stand by each other
and i found this cute thing on the net:
 |
| You complete it from A-Z |
 |
| Awwwwww |
 |
| I'll stand by you,always and forever,whether you want it or not,haha~ |
 |
| Omg,so cuuute! I'll be the first person to sign it,i swear! but friendship cannot be bound by any contract or whatsoever,it's a commitment right from the heart from the start to the end - till the inevitable separates us |
There's no one like you! (:
I love you from the bottom of my heart!
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ multipled by
<3
Tuesday, 3 April 2012
Dear Ex
Boyfriend :
funny how i wanted to do this whole dear thingy and not realise that i'll have to do a dear ex boyfriend shit. never was in a serious relationship so what am i going to say?
well,if placed in a real life situation i'd probably go :
ohh hey, thanks for being a part of my life,for making me see the world, understand people and for loving me though you've stopped. the world doesn't end here, so here's to goodbye and i'm sure we'll both move way ahead in life with someone who we deserve more.
woah sey, i really wish i'll be this strong if i'm ever left heart broken!
Best friend:
Whose my ex best friend? Are you the one? :O
funny how i wanted to do this whole dear thingy and not realise that i'll have to do a dear ex boyfriend shit. never was in a serious relationship so what am i going to say?
well,if placed in a real life situation i'd probably go :
ohh hey, thanks for being a part of my life,for making me see the world, understand people and for loving me though you've stopped. the world doesn't end here, so here's to goodbye and i'm sure we'll both move way ahead in life with someone who we deserve more.
woah sey, i really wish i'll be this strong if i'm ever left heart broken!
Best friend:
Whose my ex best friend? Are you the one? :O
Dear Person
I HATE :
Hate now sounds a word to extreme to me maybe cause i've been hating too much till the point i realise that my true feeling towards you is just say a little more than dislike? To be honest,i'd say thank you to you because you're the one who lifts my spirits all the time,who makes me want to strive harder and prevent myself from falling instead bouncing back up,stronger each time.there's this one thing negative thing about me and that is i cannot hate forever. ya,call it a soft spot or whatever. but when i see things not going right for you,i'll want to do something especially is you meant something to me before i started hating. so haters gonna hate but for me i'm happy for the presence of my haters. it reminds me i'm a human, i've a heart and i've got feelings. it makes me feel i'm a complete person because i am able to portray the six basic emotions with you around.
I LIKE :
Like is a word too mild.whut,the word 'mild' doesn't fit in but you know what i mean,lazy brain can't think of the right word to use. Everyone's likeable in my eyes.All you have to do is portray that one good quality of yours or for that matter just a good deed which makes me go 'awwwww' and taadaa i like you (: living life the simplest way possible and therefore liking people is just as simple :D
So whoever you are, as long as you're reading this, i like you. it sure means something that you've read this far,right?
In general i like : YOU,my friends, my family, my relatives, my classmates, my ex-classmates and all those people out there who have helped me or people close to me (:
Hate now sounds a word to extreme to me maybe cause i've been hating too much till the point i realise that my true feeling towards you is just say a little more than dislike? To be honest,i'd say thank you to you because you're the one who lifts my spirits all the time,who makes me want to strive harder and prevent myself from falling instead bouncing back up,stronger each time.there's this one thing negative thing about me and that is i cannot hate forever. ya,call it a soft spot or whatever. but when i see things not going right for you,i'll want to do something especially is you meant something to me before i started hating. so haters gonna hate but for me i'm happy for the presence of my haters. it reminds me i'm a human, i've a heart and i've got feelings. it makes me feel i'm a complete person because i am able to portray the six basic emotions with you around.
I LIKE :
Like is a word too mild.whut,the word 'mild' doesn't fit in but you know what i mean,lazy brain can't think of the right word to use. Everyone's likeable in my eyes.All you have to do is portray that one good quality of yours or for that matter just a good deed which makes me go 'awwwww' and taadaa i like you (: living life the simplest way possible and therefore liking people is just as simple :D
So whoever you are, as long as you're reading this, i like you. it sure means something that you've read this far,right?
In general i like : YOU,my friends, my family, my relatives, my classmates, my ex-classmates and all those people out there who have helped me or people close to me (:
Monday, 2 April 2012
Purpose
tumblr gets me thinking,maybe i should unfollow the not-so-happy tumblrs.
but then again what's life without deep thoughts?
SEEEEE,how i can constantly have an on-going argument with myself ALL THE TIME.
boooooo.
anyway,i saw this on tumblr: ...... and i feel like doing it too,but nah,too exposing?
but then again what's life without deep thoughts?
SEEEEE,how i can constantly have an on-going argument with myself ALL THE TIME.
boooooo.
anyway,i saw this on tumblr: ...... and i feel like doing it too,but nah,too exposing?
I will write about the following, leave one in my ask box
Dear person I hate,
Dear person I like,
Dear ex boyfriend
Dear ex best friend,
Dear best friend,
Dear *anyone*,
Dear Santa,
Dear mum,
Dear dad,
Dear future me,
Dear past me,
Dear person I’m jealous of,
Dear person I had a crush on
Dear girlfriend
Dear boyfriend
maybe i'll do it say one a day? yes,okay,i've decided!
anw,i wanted to blog about the purpose of life today but i'm just too lazy...
so in brief, i just cannot agree and never will be able to agree with people who think that life is all about adorning themselves and making themselves attractive to lure people of the opposite sex. i cannot stand seeing people leading their life in that manner,okay maybe that's not their purpose in life but then why does it seem so?
treasure and lead life in the simplest way possible
^ that's my motto to live by (:
i've been unknowingly saying it to myself and to some people around me quite often.
 |
| feel strongly about this!
It's sad to say that the world is turning into a cruel one,its becoming way too fake. People pretend to be nice in front of you. Their true colours are hidden behind the pretentious mask that they wear when they're with you/ talking to you,etc. It hurts to know and it takes time to know who these people are because they're just so good at wearing the pretentious mask that they leave no trace/mark of it being a mask.
Something to remember when school starts - don't get too close to anyone at the beginning, know them well enough first cause then the chances of being hurt will be less.
On a motive to lead a happy life (:
<3
|
Sunday, 1 April 2012
Hey,Its APRIL FIRST
April fools used to be a joy with you in my life (:
Not that you're no longer in my life but life was pretty much more happening back in 09/10.
I had a bunch of crazily awesome friends around me. Fooling and getting fooled myself is something i'd remember all my life.and today there's no one i'd want to fool,probably cause it falls on a lazy sunday? ahaha.
oh how can i forget that my phone used to be 'alive' back then too and now it's just chucked in one corner of the room,silently.are you ever going to text me or will the coming years just be gone by me waiting and more waiting?
Anyway,here's some april fool pranks which have secured a place in my memory book:
I was fooled just 1 minute before april fools day ended -.-. this annoying guy texted me saying he broke his hand and was otw to the hospital. it's quite dumb cause if you broke your hand,how on earth are you typing me a msg? but oh well,people can do it with just one hand right...so ya :/ i believed.it started off with a casual convo and then bum,the sudden outbreak I INJURED MY HAND. i was being fooled several times in the day by the same person so i thought why'd he do it again,moreover when the day was alr ending.
this april fool prank was a joke,seriously hilarious!
it was a schooling day and we were schedule for a geography test on 1st april.in the early daze i was told the test was cancelled & obviously i didn't believe.then somehow the news was spread to a portion of the class and they came asking me if it's true,me being the geog rep...so i,realising how mean i was,did not answer them-ignored their ques.and the 1st thing the teacher said upon entering the class "this is not an april fool's joke,the test is on".HAHAHAHA.
and the fun-est part of april fool's used to be fooling people,not just anyone but you! funny how you believed my pranks ♥
ahh extremely tempted to prank you today too,but no,must maintain!
i'm a nobody anyways ):
ohhhh,I'm quite surprised to find out 'the bro' as i've named him ever since i knew about his existance,smokes!! it's not exactly shocking but i never imagined it to be this way,now it makes me wonder if you're like that too! i NEEEEED to know.should've got hold of my courage the other night and spoken to 'the bro'. but hell no,he was with some other unknown guy whom i've seen in urdu school before puffing away.i bet he saw and recognised me,how could he have not,i'm sure he knows some stuff.....
so here's to another normal day,given the name of APRIL FOOLS.
<3
Not that you're no longer in my life but life was pretty much more happening back in 09/10.
I had a bunch of crazily awesome friends around me. Fooling and getting fooled myself is something i'd remember all my life.and today there's no one i'd want to fool,probably cause it falls on a lazy sunday? ahaha.
oh how can i forget that my phone used to be 'alive' back then too and now it's just chucked in one corner of the room,silently.are you ever going to text me or will the coming years just be gone by me waiting and more waiting?
Anyway,here's some april fool pranks which have secured a place in my memory book:
I was fooled just 1 minute before april fools day ended -.-. this annoying guy texted me saying he broke his hand and was otw to the hospital. it's quite dumb cause if you broke your hand,how on earth are you typing me a msg? but oh well,people can do it with just one hand right...so ya :/ i believed.it started off with a casual convo and then bum,the sudden outbreak I INJURED MY HAND. i was being fooled several times in the day by the same person so i thought why'd he do it again,moreover when the day was alr ending.
this april fool prank was a joke,seriously hilarious!
it was a schooling day and we were schedule for a geography test on 1st april.in the early daze i was told the test was cancelled & obviously i didn't believe.then somehow the news was spread to a portion of the class and they came asking me if it's true,me being the geog rep...so i,realising how mean i was,did not answer them-ignored their ques.and the 1st thing the teacher said upon entering the class "this is not an april fool's joke,the test is on".HAHAHAHA.
and the fun-est part of april fool's used to be fooling people,not just anyone but you! funny how you believed my pranks ♥
ahh extremely tempted to prank you today too,but no,must maintain!
i'm a nobody anyways ):
ohhhh,I'm quite surprised to find out 'the bro' as i've named him ever since i knew about his existance,smokes!! it's not exactly shocking but i never imagined it to be this way,now it makes me wonder if you're like that too! i NEEEEED to know.should've got hold of my courage the other night and spoken to 'the bro'. but hell no,he was with some other unknown guy whom i've seen in urdu school before puffing away.i bet he saw and recognised me,how could he have not,i'm sure he knows some stuff.....
so here's to another normal day,given the name of APRIL FOOLS.
<3
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